In Love

I'm sitting here watching the last Harry Potter movie on cable for the zillionth time, he's asleep on the couch next to me, I'm surfing Pintrest cause I'm a girl and it's one of the many inane things we do and it's a simple Saturday night.

And I couldn't be more in love.

I'm going to get stupid sappy on you now. So either prep yourself or hit the back button on your browser and get out while you can!
We've been together nearly 4 years. We're in it to win it. We've hosted for 4 Thanksgivings, one for each year. And every year it goes off without a hitch.

We compliment each other better than I thought possible.
He stays busy in the kitchen and I fill beverages.
He lets people help when they ask and I free up a seat for their tired feet.

I didn't think an understanding and an appreciation for another person could be felt so deeply. I really feel like I've found my other half.

Except for on nights like last night where I got all PMS-pissy and slept on the couch because I'm that girl who blows things out of proportion and he's all you're-crazy-I-love-you-but-I'm-going-to-sleep. Which then leads to me be all I-can't-believe-your-asleep-while-I-wallow-in-my-self-made-sobfest.

And then we wake up, sheepishly apologize, genuinely say "I love you" and move on.

See? Compliment. Understanding. Balance. Other half.

This whole post was moved from this silly lil' picture I found on-line

It made me smile and giggle and think "that isn't really us. I don't think. But I totally get what they are saying."

Love. It's a tricky business. It twirls things within so much that it's hard to tell if they were originally within you or grew from something. Or both. Love. It makes you put your dumb self out there for the other to poke at and say "I'll keep that dumb stuff." Love. It creates an understanding of "You're an idiot" equals "I adore your crap." Love. It makes you feel whole when you didn't think you weren't.

My wine glass is empty, he's still sleeping next to me and I this is right where I want to be. If you'll excuse me, I need to go be in love with my life.

And in love with love.

Emotionally Investing

There is no feeling like the vote of confidence you get for being recognized for a job well done. I'm one of the lucky ones who work for a company that does just that. It was 2 years ago this month that I was preparing to leave a very ungrateful place of employment. (There are a few posts you can go back and read to understand my frustration then and appreciate my feelings now. Start here. And then the new job post here. And then the reason why I do what I do here.)

But man oh man, in the past few months I've been acknowledged for my abilities so many times over it's dizzying. In August we had our regional meeting and I was given 3 awards! Three, baby! One was from the COO for being number one in the company during a bean promotion. Another was a Team Hero award that my own district team gave me. They voted me as the team hero for the year and I got a little tiger paw award because as a district we "believe in holding back tigers not pushing elephants." And then I was given an award by regional manager for a core value. Our company has 4 core values and each year our regional manager gives an award for each value to a manager that exemplified that value. And mine was for Commitment to Unique Personality. No surprise there!

All my awards. Pretty cool, huh? I'm proud.

And then I find out that I get to travel to one of our coffee farms in January. And that coffee farm is in Coast Rica!! I was number one in the entire company for a bean promotion in the month of June and because of that was put in a nomination pool to go to the coffee farm where that bean comes from and I won!! The company sends 2 groups of 6 of company members that have excelled at something in their job. AND I GET TO GO! Before the bean promotion started my boss said that if our district was number one in the company, he would nominate the number one store manager to go to La Minita, Costa Rica. I wanted that trip and I held the number one spot for nearly the whole promo. I dropped to number 3 for a few days and then took it back and never let it go. And now I get to to go to our coffee farm, pick the coffee off the mountainside myself, meet the farmers, it's going to be life changing.

AND THEN.... about 3 days before I find out about the trip, my boss approached me with taking over one of the top 10 busiest stores in the company. It's a drive-through location and a million dollar a year store and I was nervous about the change. But to say no to the opportunity that he was willing to give me was just dumb. The door had been opened and I would have shot myself in the foot if I had said no. So I had made my decision on my drive home, I'll take the job. And 5 days before our biggest promotion of the year, I took on a beast of a store. And I have survived 3 weeks so far. No one has quit, and the store hasn't burned down. I do have my work cut out for me. I'm noticing the deeper I get into this store, the more work it is going to be. But, when I take a step back and look at my successes and the awards I was given, I know I can do this. I have a reputation to protect and I don't fail.

I was in the midst of writing this about a month ago and got side-tracked and didn't finish it until now. I'm 3 weeks and 2 days into my new store and am at the overwhelmed part. I have 5.5 days to meet my company goal, because you know my district strives to be the best and we all agreed to meeting goal on 10/21, even though the promotion goes until 10/31. I broke down at a meeting today, sometimes it's all too much. 95 pounds in 6 days. REALLY? And today when I voiced my concern, the tears welled up because my peer team and my boss are so supportive. I have 3 people coming to my store to help sell and I have refocused my energy into my top sellers and the ones who care. I'm reamping myself. I made a paper chain to cut off each link every time we sell a pound, I'm trying to create energy within my team to sell sell sell. It's big and scary and completely possible.

I have a quote at the end of my auto-signature on my work email "What you get be achieving your goals is not as important as what you become by achieving your goals." -Henry David Thoreau

And I believe that is true.

Cool Parenting Points

I did something very cool last Friday, I took a pre-teen to a "documentary" movie about her favorite boy band. I say documentary loosely because it wasn't nearly the level of National Geographic or those Ancient Aliens shows on Discovery or History channel or something. But it was a movie compiled of little interviews and moments from tour and live shows bits to make a surprisingly fun movie.

One Direction is a band compiled of five talented British boys. They took the pre-teen world by storm in the last 2 years thanks to Britain's The X Factor and Simon Cowel. All 5 boys auditioned separately and Simon thought they had something worth while and put them together. Low and behold, he was right. They are in the middle of a world tour right now and will be doing another one next year. And yes, I'm keeping my eyes out for tickets in the Minneapolis area.

That last paragraph will put me in the category of a DIRECTIONER. Click the word to find out, it'll make you giggle.

But seriously, I had a blast at this movie. I bought the tickets in advance, told her we were going via instagram. You know, took a picture of the confirmation, tagged her in it and put it on instagram. Cause I'm all hip like that. I told her she could even pick out my outfit. (Sadly, she didn't get home from her friends in time to do so, so I got to look like the smokin' step-mom that I am without her help.) We got our 3D glasses, our obligatory popcorn, candy and coke before hand and sat with bated breath, waiting for the moment when it would start and we could all "woo-hoo!!!" at the opening credits.

The whole movie made me very nostalgic for my New Kids on the Block days. I was in love with that late 80's-early 90's boy band. Their posters were all over my bedroom, I knew all their "fun" facts, had the doll, the game, every jewelry piece possible, and I KNEW I was meant to be with Donnie. He and I were SOOOO going to get married. Connecting those old memories to this night made it amazing for me. As I settled into this movie and accepted the fact that I really do like their music, they actually can sing, and are really charming and humble, I looked over at Miss K and my heart did a leap. Seriously, you guys I wish you could have seen her when the footage of the five band members playing "live! in concert" came on the big screen for the first time. She sat in the seat next to me, her Skittles in her lap and her too-big-for-her-face 3D glasses on, her eyes wide and her hands over her mouth in complete AWE. It was real. And she was SO their number one fan at that moment. That was my favorite everything about this event, watching her and remembering that feeling so well.

There are times in my step-parenting life that I question everything I do and who I am. But this night I did it right. I let her be her, love what she did for the same reasons, completely embraced why we were there and fell for her and who she is even more. And One Direction, listen to them. They are cute and man, they make some catchy music. For reals.

Writing

I need to start writing again. I miss being able to sit and put my thoughts down onto paper or the interwebs. You know, just somewhere that it can be looked at again. I do carry a notebook with me nearly all the time to write down ideas, things I want to remember, funny anecdotes, the latter of those usually is something that makes me howl with laughter while I'm drinking. And then going back and looking at it sans booze, it's still funny (if I can read it that is.)

Anywho....

Writing. I miss it. I have the time I just choose to use that time for other things. What specifically those things are, I can not pinpoint right now. I need to pull out my ideas books and my little notebooks that I write my ideas down in. I need to delve into what makes my mind run.

I should actually go do that right now. Rather than writing about how I want to.

And I'm out.

A Good Day and a Few Photos

I feel like so much has happened in the last week that my heart and brain are going to explode. I need a day or 2 that is very uneventful to give all that is inside time to relax, decompress and escape if it's not needed any more.

Last Saturday we had Lily and took her to the Stone Arch Bridge Festival.

It was so much fun! Chuck works right down there so we parked for free, had a free beer at his work (yeah, is job is so cool that they have a keg of beer on tap) and took out to see the sights. Lily is now at an age where you don't have to keep an eye on her every moment, just every other. She doesn't need a stroller and will dawdle along with us. We got cotton candy, hot dogs, some french fries,another beer or two and meandered our way around. Listened to some music, looked at the river, looked at art and wanted to buy some very badly. Lots of photography, some ah-mazing! shots, some wicked cool jewlery, some just funky art pieces. I love festivals like this.

And then it started to rain. Not a oh-this-is-such-a-nice-summer-rain but a freaking downpour. And the whole thing is outside so we just had to walk through it all back to Chuck's work. We were totally those parents in flip flops with the drenched child shivering from feeling the need to finish her ice cream cone in the chilly rain all the while her face paint is streaking down her face. First class parenting right there. But we made it back, dried off because Chuck's work is also that cool that they have showers, towels and a dryer. And had another free beer while we waited for the rain to stop. I sat down with Lily at the big white-board and taught her how to play tic-tac-toe. And I did not teach her the rule of "Oh no no sweetie, my circle always stays in the middle."

Once the rain stopped we headed back out into the glorious sunshine. Seriously. It was beautiful out! We continued our walk and were determined to make it all the way to the actual Stone Arch Bridge, (which by the way, the festival isn't on the bridge at all.) We got talked into a SA-WEET deal with a photographer, a $500 photo session with a framed 5x7 in the end all for $50. Yes please!! We're all really excited for that. I was particularly excited, family photos with this great family I've gained, oh man, does that sound awesome!!

He was teaching her to skip stones.


It was such a good day. It was easy and carefree and no agenda. Chuck and I realize we travel very well together with no agenda. We rocked Chicago for a weekend (in fact I need to blog about that awesome time!) But not having plans and just going with the flow totally works for us. Lily didn't have any tantrums (surprisingly, to me) Chuck and I totally enjoyed ourselves and each other and the sun came out after a big, fat rain.

And lastly, my favorite photo from that day...

Seriously. Makes me melt.

A First for Me

Those aren't just any old postcards. They are my very first Mother's Day cards! I was given 3! And each of them warmed my heart so so much!

The girls gave me one that said something like "Ever though you're not our mom, Happy Mother's Day!" Too cute! And Lily signed it too, she has the best signature right now, there is a big circle over her 'i' and her 'y' is sometimes backwards and surely none of the letters are the same size. And Kira is really working on her actual cursive signature.

Chuck's made me cry and still makes me well up every time I read it. We're both so thankful for the other and how much we've added to each other's lives. I'm so touched that he took a moment to write to me from the heart. I really got lucky with this one!

And my aunt sent me one. What a lovely surprise! She reminded me that there are many mother's in this world and all are lucky that come in contact with them. Thank you, it meant a lot to me.

I'm keeping those little gems on my mantle for a little while. :)

=

History is made.

Minnesota is the 12th state to pass marriage equality and it makes me cry tears of happiness.

I have so many friends that can benefit from this. I have so many friends that have felt less than others because of this. Not to mention the millions of people that I don't know that can celebrate today. Now we all have the chance to experience the joy of divorce.

Just kidding.

Love is love is love. Everyone should be allowed to love whomever they choose. The fact that this had to be voted on in the first place is ridiculous. If being straight and being able to get married had to be voted on in this day and age, imagine the uproar. But the fact that it passed is what is important.

Being in a relationship is hard work. It takes commitment and communication and trust and everyone should be able to choose all that comes with that relationship. All the legal benefits, all the pride to be able to say "This is my wife/husband.", all the joy of standing up in front of your loved ones and committing yourself to someone else forever, all the inner-calm you get knowing someone is yours.

Marriage equality. It's about damn time. Thank you, Minnesota. You did the right thing.

In spirit of the moment here is this song again SAME LOVE Listen to it. Really listen to it. And then do it again. And let the tears fall.

Love. Equality. Good stuff.