Friday, May 29, 2009

No AC for me.

There is an apartment across the courtyard from me that is already running their air conditioner. Really? It is only 68 degrees outside, I just checked the weather. I have my windows open and am loving it. I have an occasional breeze blow through, and I can hear the traffic and the world living right outside.

Now I realize this time last year I would have given my right arm for refridgerated air. And probably in a month or two I'm going to be singing a different tune.

But right now I love this.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

For cancers on 5/26/09

I read horoscopes out of nothing but curiousness. My favorite is the City Pages, they are creative, funny, and use cultural references to tell your future. Some times I cut them out and keep them. But when I go back I usually don't remember why I cut them out in the first place.

This was my horoscope from the Star Tribune yesterday.

"It's easier to start over at square one than it is to fix a problem. You'll get a "do-over" in a relationship. This time, let your defenses down and show up just as you feel, no pretense. You're loveable."

I don't know what the do-over is. I'm not looking to much into it. But I love love love the fact that it ends with the simple fact that I'm loveable. Everyone should be told that.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

A little validation

I walked out of work today and there were a handful of people standing on the corner and looking up at the sky. "What'cha'll staring at?" I asked. And they smiled and pointed up at the tallest building in Minneapolis, the IDS. It's 50 stories tall and if you've never seen it before and suddenly find yourself standing underneath it, it's kind of cool. They had cameras out and were taking pictures. I found out that they were from Albuquerque, New Mexico and were in town for a national volleyball competition. One of them said "We've never seen buildings this tall before. We don't have them in New Mexico." And I commented that I lived there for a year and half and wasn't too found of it. They agreed, "Yeah it kind of sucks." they said. They said that no one down there really cares about others and people here are so nice and welcoming. "Minneapolis is great." They said. I smiled, told them to try to go to the top of the building and check out the view, and wished them a good rest of the visit. They thanked me and we both went on our merry ways.

It's nice to know that my dislike for that state isn't just me.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Freedom Writers

I just watched the movie Freedom Writers. It's amazing. That is the type of teacher I want to be. I want to listen to kids, they all have something to say.

I teared up several times during the film. And then I've been watching the special features and all the kids who played the real Freedom Writers have had similar struggles has the characters they played. And that was just by happenstance.

It takes so much courage to speak up and be heard. And I wish there were more people around who would listen to the kids of today.

There was a kid in Las Cruces who I caught stealing from my work. I gave him and his friend the benefit of the doubt, and greeted them and then chose not to follow them around the music department. And sure enough, they did exactly as I thought and stole a rap CD. I was so mad that I went out in the mall and found both of the kids, brought them back to the store. They both were questioned by the police, and then the one who stole was taken out in handcuffs, and taken down to juvie to wait for him mom. It was one of the saddest things I had seen. He was a registered runaway, and was still in the clothes that they last saw him in. He wasn't even 18. I was so mad about the fact that I chose not to put a stereotype on them, and then they go a prove me right. I asked "Why did you do it? Are you bored?" And he nodded, sheepishly. Then I hollered "You need a hobby!" What he really needed was someone to listen. Someone to care. And maybe something constructive to put his energy in wouldn't hurt either.

I need to read the book The Freedom Writer's Diary. I've been wanting to pick it up since it first came out. And I need to look into going back to school for my education degree. I should've done that in the first place. Shoulda coulda woulda. But I can do it now.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

5/20/09

So I got up this morning with nothing on my agenda. After watching Ellen, having some coffee I gathered up my things and got on the 2 bus.

With no destination in mind I decided to get off the bus when either the route ended or I saw a non-chain coffee shop out the window. The coffee shop came first and I got off the bus in the Cedar/Riverside neighborhood. I went to a place called Mapps Coffee and Tea. (Why it's spelled with 2 p's I have no idea.) I got a coffee and a little tasty pastry and sat and finished a book. Then I pulled out my computer and wrote for a while.

One of my writing books has all these "Try this" exercises within the chapters and one of them is to sit down and start with "I want to write" and go from there. So I did. I am choosing not to share it here for my own reasons but it felt good to get some well articulated thoughts down on a topic that is very much in the front of my mind.

When I finished I packed up my things and started walking. I ended up walking all the way home through downtown. It took me about an hour and a half and I was nearly knocked over by the wind. And my feet have gotten a brutal awakening for flip flop seasons. They are dirty with a few worn spots from the straps of the flip flops. But I loved it. It was a nice walk.

I also stopped at the Minneapolis Public Library. I had never been there before. It's huge and a bit intimidating with ALL it's books. I didn't really know where to go to look for anything but also didn't really know what I was looking for. I sat and read for a bit and then continued on my way.

It's now only 4pm and I have walked my city. I still have yoga tonight and am going to dance/walk to that with my Ipod.

It was a nice few hours alone. I don't mind spending time by myself. But I haven't spoken in several hours and that is rare for me. Today is a good day for me to sit in my head and think.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

A little bitterness ahead - beware

So I was going to watch the movie P.S. I Love You with Hilary Swank and gorgeous Gerard Butler! (I'm talking in-my-dreams-gorgeous) But that is sooooooo not what I need right now. I do not need a girl chick flick where the man loves loves loves her all the time and wants nothing but her. Just her.

I need a good men-suck flick right now. And I'm lacking on those in my house so, I opted for the next best thing. Sex and the City. More specifically the episode where Burger breaks up with Carrie on a post-it. I'm probably going to go through the series and see what other episodes I can find where the men live up to my real life right now.

I can thank the guy friends I have in my life for being straight with me. I can ask them something and they won't beat around the bush and the best part is that they will reaffirm my thoughts that "that guy sucks."

OK, the show just ended. That worked. :-) Moving on to the next episode.

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Just a bit of self-loathing

I consider myself a fairly bright person but there are some things I just don't get. For example, if you say you're going to call, then do it. Call. Pick up the phone, dial the number and call. Damnit.

Don't use the phrase "I'll give you a call" or anything even remotely close to that if you really know that you're not going to do it. A simple take care, or this was fun, or anything else not involving future plans would do the sign off just fine.

I just don't understand it. I have been sitting in a mind boggling frustration for over a week, waiting for a cute boy to call like he said he would. And you know what pisses me off even more? Is the fact that it bothers me at all. It was only a few dates but it was so much fun. So fun. And yet I dwell on it and my mind comes up with all these reasons, when in all actuality it's simple.

And I'm going to say it...

He's just not that into me.

Damnit. It happened again. What the F?

OK. I'm getting over it. Moving on. Right? Right.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

No plans set in stone

I woke up this morning without an alarm. Then went back to sleep for another hour. I love that. Dozing in and out of the morning. When I finally rose, the sun was shinning and from my window it looked like a nice breeze. I decided to have some coffee and then go riding around the city on my bike. Seemed like a perfect day for it with the sun and all.

Wrong.

It isn't a breeze, it is a wind. And it is cold. I got a few blocks on my bike and literally said out loud to no one "Screw this. I don't want to fight the wind the whole ride." So I turned around and came home.

I sulked for a bit, then decided to get out of the house anyway and find something to do. I got on the bus with very little bus fare on my card, rode it to the train station to put more money on it. Then thought, "What the hell? Get on the train and pick a stop to get off at." I got off at the Lake St. stop, and then remembered that Town Talk Diner is down that way. A friend of mine has raved about it so I decided to take myself out to lunch.

And boy am I glad I did. One, I had a yummy meal of eggs, taters and crispy crispy bacon. And two I ended up staying for an extra hour or so chatting with the cute bar tenders and cook. One of them made me a chocolate and real strawberry malt, and the cook said he'd trade me food for cook books from work. Deal.

It was fun to sit and chat it up with cute boys. A girl can never have to much! And it was a nice way to spend my afternoon.

I then got on the bus and rode it back to Uptown and then walked home. I had a hat on the whole time, stupid wind. But the sun shinning makes it worth while. Tonight I am going to a friend's choir concert and I'm off tomorrow as well. I have no plans and it's kind of nice. I just hope it warms up a bit. I want to wear tank tops and flip flops.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Middle of the night oddity

Last night at 2:15 in the morning my phone rang. In the past when my phone has rang that late, it's either an old friend drunk dialing me, or an old friend needing me to pick him up from jail. (No worries older adults, it only happened once.) But last night it was the front door to my apartment. And usually if I'm home and expecting visitors, I'll answer and buzz them in. Last night, no thanks. I hit reject and then almost went back to sleep. But suddenly I was wide awake and wondering who the hell was at my front door in the middle of the night. My window has a view of the front door, so I got up too see if I could see the person in the lobby. I couldn't see the person on the phone, but there was a cop standing in the vestibule too, and looking like he's talking to someone who is at the phone. Then my phone ding donged with a voice mail. OK, whoever called had something to say. Or not. It was just them mumbling into the phone and pushing buttons.

So here's my theory, the cop escorted Drunky McShitfaced back to the building they said they lived in. This idiot didn't have keys and started picking people randomly off the resident list to see if anyone would let them in. After looking out the window, seeing the cop, and not caring who was trying to get inside because the cop was with that person, I went back to bed.

I woke up this morning momentarily forgetting this little episode and then it popped back into my head. I hope whoever it was found a place to sleep, and perhaps that was in detox, thanks to the nice police officer.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Last night's yoga and others

Last night I had yoga. And I did Bird of Paradise on my right hand side for the first time ever! I can now do that pose on both sides! I am so proud of myself!

At the end of yoga, I dance/walked home to a song by the Subdudes. If you haven't heard them, check them out! They rock! When I got home I changed, grabbed my wallet, hopped on my bike and rode down to the Local for beers with my girlfriends. At the end of the night I rode home and it was so wonderful! It was a clear night, a bit windy, but so glorious. I have discovered that riding is so freeing. I feels great to have the wind in my face (the breeze might be a better word. The wind like a few days ago when it was 45 miles an hour, not so much.) And I can already feel my muscles from riding. And it's a good feeling.

I have the weekend off and I might take Saturday and ride around the city and go to a museum. I am hoping hoping hoping that it will be sunny and nice out so i can enjoy it. And I might just sit outside and read.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

A bit before midnight

It is a little past 11 on Tuesday night, I have to be up at 4:30 to be to work by 6 and I can't get to sleep. I've been laying in bed for the last hour and a half trying to fall asleep and nothing.

So here I am.

I'm making some peach tea. Hoping that will help me be sleepy.

But I am also listening to one of the quietest nights I've heard in a long time. It has been trying to storm all evening. And I say trying because the wind is blowing like there is a storm coming, it smells like rain outside, and it's a got a cool serene feeling to it. Just like before a storm hits. I would love it to thunderstorm. We haven't had a good hard spring rain yet and I want to the thunger so loud it shakes the walls.

The buses roll by and the leaves move in the wind and it's one of the most calming noises there is. There wasn't much action outside tonight because of the chill and my building which is many times very nocturnal, is extremely mellow tonight.

Mmmmmm, hot tea. So soothing.

I just looked out my open window and for being the middle of the night, the sky has an odd orange tint to it. Although I am 5 blocks from downtown, perhaps I've just never noticed it before.

The buildings of downtown have decorative lights on their tops. Like the Target Corp building is the one with the multi-colored chasing lights, and Wells Fargo is the building with the stacks and stacks of gold glowing levels, and the IDS has just one strip of little lamps that run the perimeter of the top. Did you know that all these lights shut off at some point in the night? I was coming home from St. Paul one night a few years ago and thought "Oh my god, who turned off the city?" Usually it was a comfort to me to see the buildings lit up. But by this hour they were off. I don't know what time they get shut off. I want to know if they all shut off at the same time. Like it's one big switch that Glen, the city electrician pulls every night at the same time before he goes to bed. It makes a big clunking noise as it goes from on to off. I've always wanted to sit on the South side of lake Harriet at night and wait to see when they go off. Watch it officially become bed time as the buildings say "Sweet dreams."

Speaking of sweet dreams.... heres to hoping I'll get there at some point tonight.

We only serve their coffee

I've stated this before. I work for Barnes and Noble. Not Starbucks. Not Starbucks.

If anyone would actually pay attention to the ginormous sign on both of our cafe windows and any window of a Barnes and Noble for that matter, they would see a sign that says "Barnes and Noble Cafe serving Starbucks Coffee"

Granted the "serving" part is very small and most people don't read and just see that stupid familiar green sign of that lady with the mermaid hair. (That is what I think of when I look at the Starbucks logo.)

Yet yesterday was great. I got a little bit of joy out of what happened. Someone came in to turn in an application. We sent her over to customer service. And then a co-worker said "I think that was a Starbucks application." And he followed her to see what would happen. And sure enough, she was told the same thing that I say at least 10 times a day.

"I'm sorry. This is a Barnes and Noble, not a Starbucks. We don't accept those." And she turned away, defeated.

Now don't think I wish ill will on this girl. But it surly doesn't look good for a person getting hired when they can't even pay attention enough to turn in the application to the correct business.

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Friday at work

So besides a major slip-up during our morning rush at work, yesterday was pretty good. The highlights...

1. Crazy "As usual" Susan came in. She's nuts and has full-on conversations with no one. You can see her ask the question, get a response that only she can hear, then respond to it. "What do you think of..." nods aprrovingly, then says "I could see that. But I prefer..." See? Nuts. But Captain Dirty also came in. He's disgusting and will read lesbian erotica with a magnifying glass all day in the cafe. He also smells, and stares at women's chests, and thanks to co-wokers we know he doesn't wash his hands after going to the bathroom. So needless to say, we wash our hands right after we give him his change for his dumb small coffee. BUT, the highlight of these two is that Captain Dirty sat down, and was at the mercy of Susan's badgering (she will talk to anyone if you give her even a sideways glance). So he started talking and his voice sounds like if a Velociraptor spoke English. And without missing a beat Susan said "I can't understand a thing you are saying." And went back to her paper. I think she may have even rolled her eyes and shook her head like "Good grief."

2. There is a man who is off his rocker who comes in every now and then. I avoid him like the plague. He creeps me out, he gets in my bubble, he's asked how long I've been married, he's given me a photo of a girl holding a farret and asked if I liked it. He's just weird and creepy. But yesterday he hit a new level. Erez waited on him and the guy had a fish in his pocket. Yep. A fish. And not a "Look meet Goldie, my new goldfish pet." fish. A dead fish. From a river. Wrapped in a plastic grocery bag. In his pocket. I think Erez ever said "Ummm did I just get flashed a fish?" This guy had a fishing pole with him too so my guess is he was just down at the river fishing. Fine. But most people have something more ummm I don't know, normal to put their big catch of the day in. Rather than in a plastic bag, in his pocket.

3. Near the end of my day a Suit came in and wanted a small decaf coffee. We didn't have any brewed at the moment and without waiting for the options (we can brew some, offer house, or give a decaf Americano at the same price. We don't leave our customers hanging.) But he didn't want any of that, so he sat down at a table, appearing frustrated about many things. I noticed he was still in our cafe about 10 minutes later, so I brewed some decaf, paid for it myself, and brought it over to him. "Here you go, Sir. A small decaf on the house." He was shocked and asked why I did that. I shrugged and smiled and let him be. About 20 minutes later he had packed up and come over to thank me. Apparently he has had an awful day, let alone a horrible week, and my nice little gesture of a free coffee made his day. He wanted to talk to a manager to tell them how much he appreciated what I did. So I gave him to our manager on duty and let him sing my good graces. His name was Steve. And I hope Steve has a new found faith in good customer service.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

A little love note

I found a blank stationary card with these written inside it on a table at work today.

 "My dear Kenny, not exactly your typical birthday card - this is what you get for picking a poor girl. :-) I want to give you everything - and I hope with the changes I am making you will get the girl you desire. That is my wish for your birthday. I love you to (unintelligible writing) I hope you learn to accept that. I hope to give all of me, body, spirit, and mind. Happy Birthday Honey. Love you, -Yours E" 

 Whoever wrote it I think put everything on the table, right there in those few words. I hope that Kenny realizes how much E cares for him. I would give anything to have someone feel that way about me. Kenny left it on the table I'm hoping by accident and not because he didn't care. I want to keep this note because I feel like someone should. I think it was written to be treasured and held close. Someone should appreciate it.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

An afternoon ride

So I just went out for a bike ride. And the headwind... cheese and crackers that 'bout blew me over! I rode around Lake of the Isles and you'd think that during one of the curves of the lake the wind would be at your back. Nope. Not today. It was either smack dab in my face or not at all. And the not at all part was about 3 minutes of the ride.

I'm tired. And I was already tired when I left for the ride. Work was insane today. It was gloomy and rainy until about 1 and that meant that no one was going to leave their office, or everyone was going to leave their office for a nice cozy coffee. Turns out it was the latter. Erez and I ran around all morning making coffee, bagles, fraps, and more. And come 11 am we were exhausted. Keep in mind our cafe is maybe 15 by 8 feet, but you have no idea how quickly and how much you move when the line for lattes is out the door.

So this afternoon, I'm home, bored, dead-dog-tired and I decide to go for a bike ride. It was oddly refreshing to have the wind blowing at me so much I couldn't hear. But it's also a nice to time to clear my head of the day's trip ups and running thoughts.

I will say though, that carrying my old steel bike frame up two flights of stairs and trying to maneuver it through the doorways makes me break out in more of a sweat than the actual bike riding. Interesting.

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Uber fun and yea for me!

My bike is fixed! I picked it up today! And I just got back from a ride around Lake of the Isles! So much fun!

I forgot how fun it is to ride a bike. I hadn't ridden one in at least 3 years. I brought one to Las Cruces and some dick stole it within my first month of being there. (Thanks for the welcoming. One of the many reasons that city and I did not mix.)

But a family friend gave me an old Schwinn, it just needed a new wheel. So I took it in and 3 weeks later I have a bike again! It's so pretty! It's electric blue and vintage and very me! I've raised the seat up, and now just need a bigger wrench to raise up the handle bars a bit.

I was going to put up a picture, but I can not figure out how to get my pictures to download to my computer. Curses! I have a bunch of other pictures I want to put up too! I'll figure it out some time.

But I have a bike! And it's pretty! And it suits me so well!