Sunday, June 29, 2008

A day of rest part 2

There is sometimes nothing better than hanging out with your girlfriends. I got a call from my friend Mary this evening and she invited me to come hang out with her and Jamie. What a good time. Wine, laughter, heart to heat discussions. It sometimes doesn't get better than that!
I was planning on sitting at home and maybe writing, maybe reading, maybe watching TV. I was actually doing all three when Mary called. I was hesitant about going over because I was on a roll with what I was writing. But I found a good place to stop and headed over.
I'm so glad I did! Thanks ladies for a night of good things! Lots of love!

A day of rest

I love it when you go to a store, like Old Navy or Target and walking through the doors you realize that all you are wearing is from that store. Even down to your skivvies. I did that today. Apparently I heart Target more than I thought because all I had on was from Target. Even my purse. They should pay me to be a walking advertisement. I'd take the extra money!
Yesterday my friends and I had a yard sale. I sold things that I didn't use, wear, listen to or read any more. And I made over $40!! People will buy anything! It was awesome.
I slept-in today. It was great. I was dreaming that I was at a wedding with people from high school and college. The wedding was a huge production that had skits in it and everything. Than my phone rang and I didn't get to finish it. The dream was so focused on the skits and all the people making cameos appearances that I don't even remember was was getting married. I don't remember my dreams much anymore, I used to. So when I do, I don't want to wake up.
I haven't done three good things in a few days, but I think the above is the sum up. I'm reading a funny book right now, Autobiography of a Fat Bride. And I'm writing about summer camp for my next assignment. It's not nearly as hot here today as it has been. It's actually overcast today, which is nice.
Today is my day off, and I'm taking full advantage of it. Slept in, got coffee at about 2pm, went to Target and found a good deal on jeans, and am now watching Americas Next Top Model Marathon and writing. And it's nice outside. Love today!

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Hump day

First off it's my day off, which is always a good thing.
1. I had lunch with Katya. She is such a good friend.
2. I did some therapy shopping and got some fantastic new clothes at uber cheap prices! The shopping therapy did it's job.
3. I started a new funny memoir by Laurie Notaro called Autobiography of a Fat Bride. So far it's as good as it's title!

So I read a lot and I write a lot. I'm thinking of putting the two together and writing about what I read. Thoughts? I like it. So stay tuned...

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Tuesday true

It's been a long day and it's only 5:30, with some rude customers. I don't think they realize that I am a person with feelings and am just doing my job. Alas...
I'm still going to keep with the positive thinking. Todays good things
1. My friend Rebecca came back to work from vacation, she is always fun to have around.
2. I got my registration tabs in the mail! Finally. Thanks Mom! Now I can stop walking in the heat. (but I do have to pay for gas again.)
3. I'm going to my friend Katya's for our weekly viewing of Hell's Kitchen. That is always fun.
And tomorrow is my day off. Huzzah!

Monday, June 23, 2008

Oh my

I found this searching craig's list. There is nothing OK about it, I'm hoping it's a fake, but at the same time I got a late night chuckle out of it. Enjoy.
One bedroom apartment in the heart of uptown. Great location, not that great of an apartment. Although, one man's junk is another persons treasure, keep an open mind.

Approximately 375-400 square feet, including the couple holes in the floor. Don't worry, they aren't major, yet.

Bedroom is normal size, 10x9, I believe. Has cable hook up, but it will need to be re-wired. Either mice or squirrels at some point decided they were hungry and chewed through some of the coax cable.

Bedroom has a spacious closet, make sure you put plastic by the ceiling, there is a small water leak and your clothes will get wet and musty. You can use staples or nails, just don't make any permanent markings.

Features a full bathroom, water in the bath and shower comes out rusty for about 4-5 minutes. No worries, the rust color goes away, but if you want warm water, you will need to run it for 9-10 minutes. However, the sink has very little rust and warm water kicks in right away. The toilet often gets clogged up, I will provide a plunger at no cost.

Full eat-in kitchen. Offers a lot of cabinets and counter space. There is was a small fire where a past tenant left the stove burner on while cooking ramen, the wall next to the burner is a bit black and charcoaled, but can be easily covered with a piece of art or calendar. The refrigerator works well, it will keep your food cold, but the freezer will need to be defrosted every so often.

Large living room, as mentioned above, there are a couple of holes in the floor but can be hidden easily with a rug. Plus the your future neighbor down stairs is a pretty cool guy. Has quite a few windows in the living room, although a couple of them are boarded up. I am looking into replacing the glass that is missing, probably before winter.

Apartment has original hardwood through out. You will notice peoples names carved into the wood where the living room meets the kitchen, I see it as art. The building was once a crackhouse a few years ago but now cleaned up to some peoples standards. If you find any contra band stashed anywhere, please contact the police. I will not be held responsible.

Roach problem has been taken care of, if you see any, please call me. Hornets nest in the main entrance of the building should be taken care of this week or next. (Just an FYI if you tour the unit)

Cats and Dogs are OK, just please keep them away from the holes in the floor. Wally, the downstairs neighbor doesn't want any unexpected visitors.

Rent is $450.00 a month, I pay all utilities besides electricity. $250.00 deposit along with first month rent will be required at signing. This is a 6 month lease, available July 1st.

Email to setup showings. Thanks for looking!

A random photo and todays thoughts

My mom came to visit last month and I took her out to White Sands. It's a must-see when visiting Las Cruces. It was windy but that added to the fun! I took this and the giggled to myself. What a dork!
Today's good things
1. It thunderstormed last night. It was comforting to hear.
2. Jakey picked me up from work so I didn't have to walk in the heat. Thanks Babe!
3. I got a nifty book in the mail for my writing class.
Cheerio and happy Monday.
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Sunday, June 22, 2008

Sunday is good

Today is another installment of Three Good Things.
1. Day off. Everyone loves a day off!
2. I have a cute skirt on, from my friend Katya. It's short and flirty and I feel all girly in it.
3. I wrote out a rough draft to my third writing assignment.
4. Jake made yummy ham and cheese sandwiches for lunch.
OK, so that is four. But one can never have too many good things.
It's cooled down here and by that I mean it's in the 90's and not the 100's. But it's surprisingly pleasant outside. I have a meeting at work at 7pm and I'm sort of looking forward to walking to work in the evening air. Maybe that is good thing number 5.
Oh here you go, good thing number 5 and 6.
5. Talked to my friend Lynn today. She is a dear and understands and listens better than almost anyone.
6. Talked to my mom today too. I miss my mom. Need I say more?
I'm digging this good thing thing I got going on. I think it can stay. :-)

Today's good things

1. Had a yummy lunch at a local sandwich place.
2. Got a ride to work - thanks Jakey!
3. It rained! I miss rain.
4. Got a ride home from work - thanks Elizabeth!

See? New thought process, new goals, equals new me!

Saturday, June 21, 2008

3 good things

I spent the day yesterday in my head and trying to figure out why I'm so unhappy. I came to no conclusion. So I'm going to take baby steps to a better frame of mind. Three good things that I noticed yesterday...
1. A customer told me I was so nice and helpful and he was going to come back thanks to me.
2. I was walking home and passed by the sweetest pink and yellow flowers that made me smile in the heat.
3. I spent the evening with friends talking about nothing specific and everything under the sun and laughing a lot. A lot

Three good things = better self.

Thursday, June 19, 2008

If I were in Minneapolis right now.

Do you know how many places I could go to if it weren't so god damn hot out?! But to top it off do you know how many places I could to if I were back home in Minneapolis?
Caribou Coffee.
Uptown, for the shopping and people watching
A walk around the lake
To my mom's for some laughs.
To Cathy and Scott's for even more laughs.
The Art Institute - I could spend all day wondering their rooms
A baseball game. I miss baseball.
I'd go to Matt's Bar tonight for a Juicy Lucy. If you are a burger lover, you haven't lived until you've had a Juicy Lucy.
The antique shops near my mom's house, I like old things.
To a matinee of a theatre production.

I realize I say all these things like the were part of my daily life when I lived in MN. Not so much my daily but maybe my monthly life. I just really miss it. But right now, this hot hot week, I miss having the freedom to go outside and not die in the heat. It's so unpleasant out, it makes going anywhere and doing almost anything not as much fun.
Sigh... Minnesota...


I hate it when I have all these thoughts running through my head and nothing slows down long enough for me to grab it and focus. The just twitter past me. My mind races as my body sits in the heat. It's so frustrating. And to top it off, I've got the thought of I'm not good enough in the front of my mind today. Sucks.
No worries, you loyal readers. I'm just bummed today because I have a whole day off and the apartment to myself and have not been the least bit productive.
Maybe I'll go read. That could be inspiring. Lets just hope I don't fall asleep instead.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008


I have a new photo program on my computer, so I'm playing around with photos. This is uber fun. And speaking of uber fun, this was taken at one of my favorite burger joints in LC.

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Monday, June 16, 2008

Day dreams

I love my job. I work in a bookstore, have fantastic discounts and benefits (more than just insurance), and for the most part get to talk to nice people. (I could blog and blog and blog about the ridiculous jerks that come into my department on an almost daily basis, but right now they don't deserve any more than what I've already given them.) But in my down time, I start to day dream. I twirl a pen around my fingers mindlessly and imagine what else i could be doing if I had all the money, time, and energy in the world.
Drive highway one...
Sit in my favorite ugly red chair and read a good book with a mug of coffee by my side, sigh...
But lately it's been how can I read and write all the time.
Now keep in mind, not too long ago it was what the F am I going to do when I get home. But now I have more energy, more willingness to focus, and an itch to get out my thoughts.
Hence the blog.
How great would it be to be a book reviewer?! I get to read and write about what I read. Fan-freaking-tastic!
I've started to frequent the websites of some of my favorite writers and I cyber-flip through their pages and am happily envious. Someday, maybe I'll be a published writer...

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Ahhhh summer

After not doing much all day, then taking a nap because I was tired from not doing much all day, my evening is picking up. Let me tell you what rocks. An impromptu dinner of brats, beer, and friends. That is where my evening is at the moment. The boys are cooking, the girls are drinking,laughter and discussion is had by all. I love it when stuff like this happens. All your friends have no plans and get together for a yummy meal. It's even better because it's summer. I think everyone has the childhood thoughts of summer fun in the back of their mind when they get together as adults in the summer setting sun. Remember when everything you did in the summer involved your friends and new found fun times? It brings a smile to your face, and your eyes gaze into the distance, thinking of the free feeling summer had before we all became grown-ups. I think that is what makes nights like this so special. It's like we all get to step away from the fast moving daily lives of work and bills, and getting things done and errands run. We take the evening to enjoy the comfort of friends, beer and grilled food. Ahhhh, summer.
May you all take a day or five or ten this summer and do the same thing.

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Just let me get this off my chest

I was informed yesterday that i hadn't blogged in a while and I was a tiny bit stunned that anyone actually came on a read what I wrote. So ask and ye shall receive...

I would like to preface this with I try to be a generally happy nice person and tend to get annoyed when all other people do is piss and moan about things. But this blog is going to be filled with piss and moan. Brace yourself.

1. We had a water stain on the ceiling that was noted last fall when we move in.
2. A leak started where the water stain already was this spring when we FINALLY got our AC hooked up.
3. A week, yep a week, later Roto Rooter comes and rips down the ceiling and repairs the leak. Leaving a mess of ceiling debris on our floor and a giant whole in the ceiling where mind you, we could see the sky through the roof. Lovely.
4. Several days later, the "maintenance" (and I quote because they suck and don't deserve the real title) patched up the hole.
5. Many days ofter that, a "maintenance" guy comes back to paint the ceiling and I asked if I needed to cover anything in the room. Plant splatters you know. "Uh, no. I'm just painting the ceiling." was the troglodyte reply.
6. However, he didn't paint because it wasn't dry enough to sand. He'd be back in the morning.
7. The following afternoon I arrive home, to see the ceiling painted yet not sanded. Fine. But to top it off there are paint splatters all over our stuff.

What to do now? You all know that no matter how much we push, pry, beg and plead nothing will come of this. We won't get reimbursed for the damages, no one will come to clean up the mess, the shitty paint/no sanding job will never get fixed, and we will still be expected to pay a full months rent.

I say it again, fuck you Park Place Apartments!

Usually I wouldn't be so upset, because it is just things that have paint splattered on them, and things can be replaced. It's the principal of the the whole ordeal. It's inconsiderate, it's rude, there is no compassion, no one who can do anything about what has happened gives a shit. I even asked the "maintenance" asshole if I should cover things up and he was nonchalant about it all. And then he goes and damages all my things.

Sucks sucks double sucks.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

This makes you think...

So I work in a bookstore and when I get bored or have an extra moment in between helping people looking for a book that "was on that table a few months ago. It was blue. Do you know what I'm talking about?" (Believe it, it happens. Anyway, when I have time I like to type in a keyword and see what kind of books come up. Kind of like a google search for just books. I have a found a book that everyone should look into. It's called "Not Quite What I Was Planning." It's a book filled with six word memoirs about random peoples lives. Some famous, obscure, and unknown authors. It's awesome!!

Here are two examples that I randomly turned to---
"Clueless meets Ophelia without the suicide" - Larisa Ballinger
"Wannabe heroine but just Plain Jane" - Tanya Holland

Pretty cool, huh? I challenge you to think about what you would say about your life if all you could say was six words. I'm still thinking of mine. I'll let you know.

Monday, June 9, 2008

The shiznit

Work was fine, nothing exciting today. And the best part of my 7-4 day, no one yelled at me or made fun of me, or walked out upset.
But beside that, let me tell you what rocks. Having burgers on the grill, cold beer and a nice summer evening. And having you air conditioning working again. It's been absolutely fucking miserable here with the temperature close to 100 degrees and no sort of cooling system in our house. And to top it off, I'm now going to go work out now. Nothing like eating a greezy burger, fries, and light beer and then going to run your chubby ass on the treadmil. A-woo-hoo!
Then I'll come back to my wonderfully cooled apartment, and read a hilarious book by my new fav author, Jenn Lancaster. If you like bitter self-deprecating humor, she is the one for you.
Not bad for a Monday.

Sunday, June 8, 2008


So Jake and I just ran to Wal-Mart, and yes I know it's almost midnight but I just got off work and we were both hungry. So homemade pizza is in the near future and we needed a cutting board from the place of roll-back prices.

Anywho... there are some odd cats at Wally World. I'm sure you can relate, we've all been there past 9-5 working hours and I don't think you've really lived if you haven't been to a Wal-Mart in the middle of the night. It's an experience. And let me tell you why...

The girl walking out ahead of us was a piece. A piece of something that should have put more clothes on. She was dressed in all black, but had hott pants on. I add the double T in hott because they were those shorts that are so short, you get the camel toe in the front and a good view of some ass cheek in the back. She also had on a bikini top. Gross dirty black tennis shoes and nothing else. All black and very minimal.

To top it off, she had three other people with here. One guy I'm assuming was her boyfriend, and a younger boy and girl. I don't know whats worse, the fact that she could have been their very young mother, or if she is their sister and has to take care of them for whatever reason. AND, she also had a tramp stamp. A tramp stamp is a tattoo that sits right at the small of the back, usually a swirly design involving flowers or a word. Her tramp stamp was her name. Patricia. A Patricia shouldn't be dressing like that and a Patricia wouldn't get their name tattooed on the small of their back.

As we were leaving Jake said "See you later, Patricia."
And without missing a beat, Patricia turned and said "Bye."
That is a small glimpse into the daily life we live down here.

Friday, June 6, 2008


How do you handle it when your life seems to come to an impasse? When you find yourself at a crossroads in your life and have no f**king clue which way to go. Either way is dark and scary and unknown. And that is the worst part, fear of the unknown. It's not fear of the result, or of the walk down, or what you will encounter along the way. It's fear of not knowing any of those things. And all the what if's and could be's. I hate it.

Yet when the time comes and you have to take that first step, I say to myself or anyone else going through the same yet different ordeal... "It'll be OK because it has to be. Things are going to happen and change whether we are ready or not." In essence, quit being a pussy and take charge of your life.

I feel like I've been sitting at this particular crossroads in my life for months now, and one raod has some sun shinning on it more than the other. It's looking friendlier, more inviting, and oddly familiar. Time and some deep breaths will come in handy in the near future.

Stay tuned to actually understand what I'm talking about. Rather than me just speaking in metaphors.

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Stop, take a breath

Jesus, that last one was long winded. Kudos to those who made it through.

If I had the power to fix what sucks

I wrote this hoping to send it into the Las Cruces newspaper as an editorial. Then I learned that a letter to the editor can only have maximum 300 words, and I have never been a lady to keep her mouth shut . Let alone to say so little. So here I am, posting it on here. I mostly just want the words out there, rather than stewing in my mind.
Enjoy and feel the rage and annoyance

I'm turning in my resignation to living in Las Cruces. From now on I am only stating that I am just on a long visit and no one needs to be the wiser to the fact that I actually live here. Unfortunately it's on my drivers liscence so it's true. The people who live here don't give two hoots (I'd use a worse word here, but this is a public space.) about you, about the city, let alone about their own well being. I've never been to a city where it truly is the land of manana. There is no urgency here, no compassion and no empathy for others. People go about their daily lives treating others like they don't matter. It's rude, hurtfull and nothing near what we learned in kindergarten. Treat others they way you would want to be treated.

Take the food service industry here. One goes to a nice sit down restaurant for a decent meal expecting to get treated with respect and get their food in a timely manner. And in return they will leave a nice, respectable tip for the server. Well, bad service equals bad tip which then translates into more bad service. It's a cycle that never ends and neither party is willing to change their ways so that the other will change theirs. If the server took pride in what they did and treated their tables they way they would like to be treated when eating out themselves, the server then would get a tip and the table would leave content and full rather than disgruntled and unsatisfied. I have had the bill thrown on the table at the end of the meal, I have had it take twenty minutes to get a beer (not a mixed drink that one has to make, a beer where all you have to do is take off the bottle cap or fill a glass), I've walked out because I haven't been greeted in the first five minutes. I also want you readers to know, that I can say all these things because I've been a server. I know how hectic the dinner rush can be, and how unorganized a restaurant kitchen can get, but you still keep you shit together, plates and beverages coming out on time and your tables happy, by keeping them informed. It's not rocket science, it's good service. And godo service doesn't exist in this town. Mediocre service exists, and I don't think this article will make it any better.

What is with the driving? I've never seen so many bad drivers in a hurry to get no where. When buying a car in Las Cruces, do turn signals cost extra? People don't obey the speed limit, all though I think that is a nation wide concern. But they do tail gate more often than not. Here are the rules,
1. If someone is going slower than you would prefer in the right hand lane, pass them on the left. Do not ride on their bumper hoping they will speed up. A, it's rude but B and more importantly it's dangerous. Imagine the result if the first driver suddenly stopped. You would have no where to go but right into their trunk. Which is bad but even worse for all the uninsured drivers this town reportedly has.
2. If you are in the left hand lane and the person in front of you is going to slow, you should slow down, because you are probably going to fast. What's your hurry? If you are running late, speeding isn't going to get you their on time. And keep it in the front of your mind that while driving especailly at high speeds, you aren't just driving a car, you are driving something that can kill you. And the person that you hit.

In the past few days my apartment has gotten a leak in the ceiling. The plaster has started to fall, the water damage has increased, and the dripping has turned into a constant trickle. I've called the management and have gotten nothing more than a knock on the door, saying “You have a leak?” he came in looked at it, said, “I'll call a manager.” and left. That's great. I called the manager which is how the guy wound up knocking on my door in the first place. This water damage was noted when I moved in nine months ago, was never taken care of, and now we have a bigger problem on our hands. And this is a prime example as to how this city has no empathy for others. I went into the office today, and in asking questions about when this would be taken care of the reponse I got was “I don't know. I only work weekends.” Are you kidding me?! If you don't know, you shouldn't be working there! There was no “I'm sorry.” No “I'll get to it right away.” No “That's awful. Let me see what I can do.” Not even a “I can't do anything right now, but I'll let you know first thing on Monday.” I love my apartment and I'm going to be forced to move because they don't care enough about the building itself, or it's occupants to help. I live at Park Place Apartments, by the way.

I enjoy walking and occasionally I enjoy walking to work. I've never been oggeled at or whistled, hollered and honked at at 7:30 in the morning like I am here. Where I come from that type of behavior doesn't come out until after Happy Hour. I'm not a piece of meat, I'm not walking for your viewing pleasure, I'm not going to respond when you yell “Yeah Baby!”, and to top it off I'm taken. The men who do this need to be re-taught how to treat a woman. Any respectable woman would not respond to this, except with maybe a flash of the middle finger in utter annoyance. It's demeaning, disrespectful, and really knocks the females view of men down the scale of respectable-ity. Way to go guys, you didn't have me or any other woman before and you sure as hell don't have us after that.

This city has a lot of stuff but it surly doesn't have a lot of stuff that is worth doing. It's filled with insurance companies, car dealerships, doctor's offices, and churches. Yes, there is a museum or three, there is the mall (that if it weren't for that bend in the middle near Dillard's you could see from one end to another), the mountains are pretty, and the walking path on Triviz is nice. But my main concern is where is the rec center for the kids in this town? I work in a place where kids just loiter and hang out, and mess up the sales displays, and have no respect for others, things that are not theirs, or their elders. This town should be taking their tax dollars (where that money is going now, I do not know) and putting it into a place for these kids to go where they will be safe, entertained, and allowed to be themselves. And that place can't be school. If I had all the money in the world, I would build a Recreation center in that empty plot of land on Missouri near the fire station, that would be free and open for all kids to come to. It would have sports, computers, video games, books, board games, food, and even a quiet room for those who are more introverted. There are many kids who are first generation in New Mexico and their parents or parent are working more than one job, don't have the time or the patience to be with their children and so the kids just run amok in this town. There needs to be a place for them to go that isn't a mall, or a home of a friend and where they are encouraged to be teenagers. Being a teenager is hard enough, and it's even tougher when there is nothing to show that the greater public cares.

Where are our tax dollars going? Into fixing the downtown mall, where there hasn't been a lucrative business in years? Into another Pic Quick/Subway/Hotel combo right off the highway? Into building another movie theatre when we already have three? This town needs something else to go to in the evenings that doesn't keep the public sitting on their butts, in silence. Is the money going towards building more overpriced homes for the retired to move into, when the average household income in Las Cruces is $30,000? How are the people who can't afford to move to another city going to be able to afford a house if we keep building big houses for the old and rich to move into? What about the young and financially struggling who may live here all their lives? The tax dollars should be going into the future of Las Cruces, the children who, like we all did at the same age, just want to be heard even if they whisper. Not into the ones who have lived their lives and are ready for some quiet in the desert. It's not going to stay quiet and peaceful if we don't take note of who will be in charge of Las Cruces in twenty years.

The compassion for others is very low, the feeling of a community is hanging on by a thread, and I don't know where else to go to get others to be aware of the many problems Las Cruces faces besides putting it in words in this newspaper. I moved here excited to be living somewhere new and fresh. And unfortnatly, a year later all I see are the problems rather than anyone willing to find a solution.

What to do?

I have a million thoughts running through my head, thousands of things I want to discuss, hundreds of topics to write about. And along with all that a huge fear of people finding out what actually runs through my head.
How does one do this? Blogging always seemed to be so far away from my reach and yet here I am... blogging my first blog. And what am I saying? Nothing of importance. Is anyone going to see this? I have no idea.
I've googled my name before and there are so many more interesting girls with my name than me. Not that I'm boring. That has always been my motivation for writing about my life - I want others to know that just because they aren't in rehab, have divorced parents and like to read with a cup coffee, they aren't boring. Their ordinary lives are completely extraordinary.
It's Wednesday, it's my day off. I've worked out, layed out by the pool, finished a book, flirted with my boyfriend, and started this blog. And it's only 3:30pm. Sounds like a decent day.